2011-09-18
From: Doug
Comments: Salvidor Dali was haunted by a false memory of his mother performing fellatio on him and then devouring his penis. I am haunted by the prospect of never receiving fellatio again. It is a real possibility.
Rating:
Summer Games
2011-09-23
From: Doug
Comments: When I was on the swim team in high school, my aunt used to help me shave my pubic hair because my mother refused to do it. Now, I know what you're thinking: 1) why can't you shave your own pubic hair?, and 2) why shave your pubic hair at all, you don't swim naked? Good questions both, and both are likely to have unsatisfying answers: 1) I told my mom that I was concerned about badly cutting my scrotum or penis if I shaved down there myself, plus another person would likely have a better vantage point with regard to thoroughly shaving the area, and 2) I told them (with somewhat tortured logic) that it was better to be smooth all over than smooth everywhere but down there with the added notion that "everyone else was doing it" thrown in for good measure. Not mentioned at the time, but somehow relevant, is the fact that women do, indeed, sometimes help one another shave their pubes, thus the idea was not totally unprecedented. Regardless, my mother was unconvinced and unwilling to help, my aunt was just unconvinced and thus did proceed to shave my junk area at least once a week for several months a year. Truth be told, I in no way needed my pubic hair shaved, not be me nor by anyone else, but it did allow me a more or less "innocent" means of getting a female to handle my frank and beans. I cannot overstate the significance of this, either. It was awesome. Got a big ol' erection every damn time, too. I'd say "sorry" to my aunt, she'd say "no problem" or "that's okay" in response, and we'd both pretend like my hard dong wasn't waving in her face. She'd always make some quip about how I should "take care of that thing" when she was finished. I wasn't really sure if she meant that I should let my boner deflate of its own accord or if a more hands-on solution was needed (i.e. jerking it), but in my bolder moods I'd start stroking before she left the room. In those instances, she'd usually let out a "nice" before leaving and shutting the door behind her. It wasn't, though, a "nice" as in "nice, he's going to explore his growing body". No, it was very much a sarcastic "nice" as in "My God, men are disgusting and this helps confirm it. Nice". It made little difference to me at the time.
Rating: n/a
Ms Pacman
2011-09-18
From: Doug
Comments: Salvidor Dali was haunted by a false memory of his mother performing fellatio on him and then devouring his penis. I am haunted by the prospect of never receiving fellatio again. It is a real possibility.
Rating:
Ms Pacman
2011-09-18
From: Doug
Comments: That should be "Salvador" not "Salvidor". Apologies to the dead weirdo.
Rating: n/a